I had for the most part of my life seen grieving in movies. I thought it had to be the black-wearing , getting drenched in (the very conveniently timed) torrential rains, with your tears mixing with the rain drops sorta thing. But grief sneaks upon you in different ways. Sometimes there is joy in the memory of a loved one lost and you smile. Sometimes there is a vacant space that suddenly makes itself known. At times there are tears and longing for the good old times. Loosing Ajji has been a little bit of all of these for the family.

She was always slow in her work – slow and steady, never in a rush. Thatha might have gotten late for his work, or visitors to her house might have waited a few (a lot) more minutes for their cup of filter kaapi than usual (but was that cuppa worth it or what?!), Nothing and I mean nothing could rush Ajji and she went about it at her own pace.

Just being with her and Thatha had the ability to calm us and help us in letting go of the pressure to run the mad race that sometimes life is. Today I wanted to brew some of that calm and what better way than to cook one of her recipes – ‘Fenugreek-lentil curry’!

All it needs is some toor dal, a spoonful of fenugreek seeds and spices and ghee.

Wash and pressure cook the dal with the methi seeds and a pinch of turmeric. In the meanwhile heat some ghee and add mustard seeds, red dry chillies and hing. Now wait for the tempering to cool and mash it up to as fine a paste as you can. Add everything together. Put in some tamarind juice, coconut milk, cow’s milk, salt to taste and some curry leaves and bring to a boil.

I tried with aloo masher thingy – what really works is the hand!

Thats it! Some steaming hot rice and your Sunday lunch cant get lazier and tastier!